My first exposure to the advertising for those "special occasion" pills worried me. Made me feel that I'm walking around with a flaccid willy absolutely terrified that Mrs S would suddenly declare the moment to be right and expect me to immediately rise to the occasion and perform to her satisfaction. And that to always be ready to satisfy Mrs S's sudden wanton need for idle distraction, I should remain in a state of semi-permanent tumescence.
Makes me think of my pets back home. Fido is all slobber and panting, so enthusiastic to anticipate and satisfy my wants and needs, eyes following my every move and ears cocked for the slightest sign to spring into frenzied action least I show disappointment at his laziness and inattentiveness. And more often than not, I ignore him. Felix on the other hand is a master of the alluring stretch, the sly inviting look and the air-caressing swish of her tail. She's learned that no mouse-trap ever pursued a mouse.
Mrs S, bless her, has never demanded that I keep a supply of blue-pills on hand and shudders at the very idea of priapism. And the simple image of me trying to be Fido has her in fits of giggles. Instead she's developed a penchant for candle-light dinners, alluring perfume and "forgetting" to get dressed properly. And face it, a woman in high-heels, G-string and pearls is a powerful incentive. And if that's not enough to add some lead to your pencil, you don't need pills. You need another woman.
These pills remind me of a scandal in Hermanus, South Africa, some years ago. A new boutique brewery drove a bill-board through the town emblazoned with the words "Beer - helping unattractive people have sex since 1652!". The resulting protest ended the campaign but not before it became obvious that the most vociferous complainants were the unattractive people!
Monday, February 11, 2008
Thursday, January 31, 2008
I just LOVE television!
In the Brian de Palma violent classic "Scarface", there's that memorable scene in the restaurant where an intoxicated Robert de Niro and wife Michelle Pfeiffer start throwing food and personal epithets at one another. The embarrassed patrons, although pretending to be unaware of the verbal discord, soon themselves become victims of Scarface's drunken wrath as he calls upon them to "look at the bad guy". "You need people like me" shouts Scarface. "I'm the bad guy. You need me so you can point and say, THERE IS THE BAD GUY."
Is it a trait of our culture that we love to see the bad guys? Perhaps because it makes us feel good? Why do we love to see someone else's misery and tragedy? Perhaps because it makes us feel blessed with good fortune? Turn on your television and you'll see what I mean. Why are our national news channels so preoccupied with the downfall of Britney Spears, Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan and the plethora of bubble-heads who've taken the dictum "Any publicity is good publicity" to an absurd extreme? Is it because their tragedy gives us a warm feeling about how normal and happy we are? Or is it because we just love to be told a story?
When my children were little more than rug-rats, bed-time was always prefaced with the demand "Tell us a story, Daddy". And I'd make up a story, any old story would do, some clever and some really dumb. Because it was not WHAT I was telling them, but rather just the telling of the story itself. And it's the same with television news.
Even if no-one knows anything, we must be told a story. So the reporter will grab any poor sod in the vicinity, who to maximize his 15 seconds of fame, will tell us a story, some of it real, some of it just spit-balling. And we lap it up because we've been entertained. And the stories we enjoy most are the bad stories, the stories that frighten us, the stories about the bad guys. So we can sit back, smug, self-satisfied and say "there's the bad guy!" and feel so much better for our own good fortune.
The only problem with having so much news-time being spent on 'telling us a story', often over and over again, (remember how often you told the same old story to your kids every night?), is that we never get around to the real news - something I haven't seen a bizillion times already - like what's the latest update on Darfur, Zimbabwe, Kenya, the Chinese who're buying the USA, the Japanese electric car that performs better than a Porche, or Westinghouse that is alleged to have buried a patent to harness electric power from tidal movements and "dinner-jacket's" plans to nuke us all.
But who cares about that? It's not about us. It's not about now. So go away - Fox is telling me a story about a princess who lived in a trailer and who became so so rich that her evil godmother called in the boogey-man who was disguised as a shrink and together they planned and schemed to have the little princess locked up in a castle for little girls who are bewitched. And when the little princess was gone, the evil godmother took all her money and used it to make the princess's little sister even more famous. But meanwhile, back in the evil godmother's trailer, something terrible was about to be discovered .... (we'll be back after our scheduled commercial break.)Gotcha for the next episode?
Is it a trait of our culture that we love to see the bad guys? Perhaps because it makes us feel good? Why do we love to see someone else's misery and tragedy? Perhaps because it makes us feel blessed with good fortune? Turn on your television and you'll see what I mean. Why are our national news channels so preoccupied with the downfall of Britney Spears, Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan and the plethora of bubble-heads who've taken the dictum "Any publicity is good publicity" to an absurd extreme? Is it because their tragedy gives us a warm feeling about how normal and happy we are? Or is it because we just love to be told a story?
When my children were little more than rug-rats, bed-time was always prefaced with the demand "Tell us a story, Daddy". And I'd make up a story, any old story would do, some clever and some really dumb. Because it was not WHAT I was telling them, but rather just the telling of the story itself. And it's the same with television news.
Even if no-one knows anything, we must be told a story. So the reporter will grab any poor sod in the vicinity, who to maximize his 15 seconds of fame, will tell us a story, some of it real, some of it just spit-balling. And we lap it up because we've been entertained. And the stories we enjoy most are the bad stories, the stories that frighten us, the stories about the bad guys. So we can sit back, smug, self-satisfied and say "there's the bad guy!" and feel so much better for our own good fortune.
The only problem with having so much news-time being spent on 'telling us a story', often over and over again, (remember how often you told the same old story to your kids every night?), is that we never get around to the real news - something I haven't seen a bizillion times already - like what's the latest update on Darfur, Zimbabwe, Kenya, the Chinese who're buying the USA, the Japanese electric car that performs better than a Porche, or Westinghouse that is alleged to have buried a patent to harness electric power from tidal movements and "dinner-jacket's" plans to nuke us all.
But who cares about that? It's not about us. It's not about now. So go away - Fox is telling me a story about a princess who lived in a trailer and who became so so rich that her evil godmother called in the boogey-man who was disguised as a shrink and together they planned and schemed to have the little princess locked up in a castle for little girls who are bewitched. And when the little princess was gone, the evil godmother took all her money and used it to make the princess's little sister even more famous. But meanwhile, back in the evil godmother's trailer, something terrible was about to be discovered .... (we'll be back after our scheduled commercial break.)Gotcha for the next episode?
He said She said ...
Some years ago I found a broken ornament in our family room and when I called my two children into my study to ascertain whether they knew anything about this, was treated to the "he said she said" and "he did she did" episode of allegation and counter-allegation. I soon realised that this was an attempt to cloud the issue and to weave a convolution of deception and extraneous ploys to avoid the real issue of "who broke the ornament?"
Viewing Hillary and Obama in their endless "Hillama tête-à-têtes" over who is best for America, we are treated to endless hours of "he said she said" bickering, instead of having them address the question of how they will fix the broken ornament, which in this case is somewhat more serious - global warming, fossil fuel depletion, nuclear proliferation, economic recession, social security, health insurance, terrorism and illegal immigration. This reminds me of my children and their reason for employing this evasive "he said she said" subterfuge.
In the case of my children, the very act of the "he said she said" distraction was clearly indicative that they were both involved in the destruction of the ornament. If one or both of them had absolutely nothing to do with the damage, a simple denial would have sufficed. The "he said she said" debate thus told me that they were both guilty of something.
In the case of Hillary and Obama, the question is "what are they guilty of"? Either they don't even know what's broken and don't want to admit to being ignorant, or they don't know how they're going to fix the problem and are trying to deflect questions on the subject - questions which may reveal a degree of incompetence and unsuitability for the job of President of the United States.
The same can be said for the Republican "Joh-Mitt" duo, where in a recent debate, poor Huck got so excluded that he would perhaps be forgiven for wishing he HAD broken the ornament and could at least interject with a confession if nothing else. At least Edwards had the common sense to realise that he was the third person at a dinner-for-two and instead of making a fool of himself went home to mamma.
It's time these debate moderators start earning their salaries and take control of the debates and realize that "he said she said" bickering is wasting valuable time and clouding the real issues.
Viewing Hillary and Obama in their endless "Hillama tête-à-têtes" over who is best for America, we are treated to endless hours of "he said she said" bickering, instead of having them address the question of how they will fix the broken ornament, which in this case is somewhat more serious - global warming, fossil fuel depletion, nuclear proliferation, economic recession, social security, health insurance, terrorism and illegal immigration. This reminds me of my children and their reason for employing this evasive "he said she said" subterfuge.
In the case of my children, the very act of the "he said she said" distraction was clearly indicative that they were both involved in the destruction of the ornament. If one or both of them had absolutely nothing to do with the damage, a simple denial would have sufficed. The "he said she said" debate thus told me that they were both guilty of something.
In the case of Hillary and Obama, the question is "what are they guilty of"? Either they don't even know what's broken and don't want to admit to being ignorant, or they don't know how they're going to fix the problem and are trying to deflect questions on the subject - questions which may reveal a degree of incompetence and unsuitability for the job of President of the United States.
The same can be said for the Republican "Joh-Mitt" duo, where in a recent debate, poor Huck got so excluded that he would perhaps be forgiven for wishing he HAD broken the ornament and could at least interject with a confession if nothing else. At least Edwards had the common sense to realise that he was the third person at a dinner-for-two and instead of making a fool of himself went home to mamma.
It's time these debate moderators start earning their salaries and take control of the debates and realize that "he said she said" bickering is wasting valuable time and clouding the real issues.
Monday, January 28, 2008
The Burden of Citizenship
As we approach the 2008 Presidential Elections it may be opportune to consider the onerous burden we share in exercizing our voting rights as Citizens of the United States. While many view citizenship as a right, few consider the burden that this right places on each and every American.
America is an awesomly powerful nation, politically, economically and militarily, and with the inherent ability to change the lives of the global population, both for the better and for the worse. With this power comes an obligation of responsibility - an obligation to act with discretion, wisdom, compassion, knowledge and foresight.
The risk we all face, as US Citizens, is that we may become arrogant - that might is right. That we may become indifferent - that lesser nations don't count. And that we may become ignorant - that we don't need to be informed or knowledgeable about other nations. And that we may be abrogating our democratic responsibility to ensure that our President and our Government is acting within the mandate we afford to them when we give them our vote.
Powerful nations that lose the ability to rule wisely, mercifully and with temperance invariably cultivate the seeds of their own destruction. And if the loyalty of its citizens is blind, arrogant and ignorant, the destruction of great nations is inevitable.
America is facing some of its greatest challenges - global warming, fossil fuel depletion, terrorism and nuclear proliferation - and it will require serious people to make serious decisions if we are to survive and prosper. And whether America gets a President and a Government that will make the right decisions and the right choices, will depend on whether US Citizens cast a vote based upon arrogance, indifference and ignorance or on wisdom and knowlege of the issues affecting not only our lives in the United States, but the lives of everyone who shares this planet.
In an interview with the son of Osama Bin Laden, the commentator ventured that America would NEVER be willing to talk with Osama Bin Laden himself. Yet it is precisely because of what America is, that we SHOULD be making every effort to sit down and talk with OBL. The essence of greatness is the ability and willingness to communicate with friends and enemies equally. To demonstrate an intent to pursue agreement and compromise. To motivate a search for a solution to differences of belief and opinion. True greatness comes not from pettiness and spite, but from a willingness to seek out your enemy, not to destroy him, but to understand him.
America will be judged internationally not only by our actions but also by our intentions, and as US Citizens it is our responsibility to ensure that in as much as we enjoy mastery of the planet, so too must we exercise this mastery through knowledge rather than ignorance. Only then can we hold our elected officials accountable to act in accordance with our mandate. Anything less makes a mockery of democracy and belittles the value of our vote.
America is an awesomly powerful nation, politically, economically and militarily, and with the inherent ability to change the lives of the global population, both for the better and for the worse. With this power comes an obligation of responsibility - an obligation to act with discretion, wisdom, compassion, knowledge and foresight.
The risk we all face, as US Citizens, is that we may become arrogant - that might is right. That we may become indifferent - that lesser nations don't count. And that we may become ignorant - that we don't need to be informed or knowledgeable about other nations. And that we may be abrogating our democratic responsibility to ensure that our President and our Government is acting within the mandate we afford to them when we give them our vote.
Powerful nations that lose the ability to rule wisely, mercifully and with temperance invariably cultivate the seeds of their own destruction. And if the loyalty of its citizens is blind, arrogant and ignorant, the destruction of great nations is inevitable.
America is facing some of its greatest challenges - global warming, fossil fuel depletion, terrorism and nuclear proliferation - and it will require serious people to make serious decisions if we are to survive and prosper. And whether America gets a President and a Government that will make the right decisions and the right choices, will depend on whether US Citizens cast a vote based upon arrogance, indifference and ignorance or on wisdom and knowlege of the issues affecting not only our lives in the United States, but the lives of everyone who shares this planet.
In an interview with the son of Osama Bin Laden, the commentator ventured that America would NEVER be willing to talk with Osama Bin Laden himself. Yet it is precisely because of what America is, that we SHOULD be making every effort to sit down and talk with OBL. The essence of greatness is the ability and willingness to communicate with friends and enemies equally. To demonstrate an intent to pursue agreement and compromise. To motivate a search for a solution to differences of belief and opinion. True greatness comes not from pettiness and spite, but from a willingness to seek out your enemy, not to destroy him, but to understand him.
America will be judged internationally not only by our actions but also by our intentions, and as US Citizens it is our responsibility to ensure that in as much as we enjoy mastery of the planet, so too must we exercise this mastery through knowledge rather than ignorance. Only then can we hold our elected officials accountable to act in accordance with our mandate. Anything less makes a mockery of democracy and belittles the value of our vote.
Friday, October 5, 2007
Arrogance, Indifference, Ignorance
In the rise and fall of great nations, power tends to breed a sense of arrogance which sows the seeds of indifference and which inevitably leads to ignorance. Perhaps this is amply demonstrated in the visit of Dr Mahmoud Ahmadi Nejad, President of Iran, to the USA and to Columbia University.
Whether we agree with his policies or not, Dr Ahmadinejad is the elected president of a soverign nation. Added to this, he is an educated science academic. Inviting him to address the students at Columbia University was admirable. Lee Bollinger's insulting introduction was America at its worst. Freedom of speech does NOT mean introducing a guest speaker as being a "petty and cruel dictator", nor of tainting the water by claiming that "I doubt that you will have the intellectual courage to answer these questions". Freedom of speech does NOT mean taking up more time introducing the speaker (with your own views) than the time allocated to the speaker (to hear his views). Perhaps Lee Bollinger was concerned as to whether the Columbia students were smart enough to listen to Dr Ahmadinejad with critical ears and thus felt the need to vaccinate them with his own bias before they became exposed to Dr Ahmadinejad?
America sees itself as all-powerful - militarily, economically and politically. We have become arrogant. We have become indifferent to opposing views, we belittle our critics and insult those who disagree with us. And we have become ignorant about the world we profess to 'govern'. And we do this at our peril.
Sun-Tzu said "Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer." Whether Dr Ahmadinejad is our friend or our enemy, insulting him and denegrating him will not make him go away nor silence his voice - all it will do is silence our own ears and add to our own ignorance.
Whether we agree with his policies or not, Dr Ahmadinejad is the elected president of a soverign nation. Added to this, he is an educated science academic. Inviting him to address the students at Columbia University was admirable. Lee Bollinger's insulting introduction was America at its worst. Freedom of speech does NOT mean introducing a guest speaker as being a "petty and cruel dictator", nor of tainting the water by claiming that "I doubt that you will have the intellectual courage to answer these questions". Freedom of speech does NOT mean taking up more time introducing the speaker (with your own views) than the time allocated to the speaker (to hear his views). Perhaps Lee Bollinger was concerned as to whether the Columbia students were smart enough to listen to Dr Ahmadinejad with critical ears and thus felt the need to vaccinate them with his own bias before they became exposed to Dr Ahmadinejad?
America sees itself as all-powerful - militarily, economically and politically. We have become arrogant. We have become indifferent to opposing views, we belittle our critics and insult those who disagree with us. And we have become ignorant about the world we profess to 'govern'. And we do this at our peril.
Sun-Tzu said "Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer." Whether Dr Ahmadinejad is our friend or our enemy, insulting him and denegrating him will not make him go away nor silence his voice - all it will do is silence our own ears and add to our own ignorance.
Monday, October 1, 2007
Education
When I was a kid, my father told me "Finish your food - there are thousands who are starving." Now that I'm a father, I tell my kids "Finish your homework - there are millions starving for your job."
Education in this country is in a poor state with too many students leaving school neither qualified for a career nor for life. Too many of our students are functionally illiterate, cannot write and have a general knowledge verging on the ridiculous. It's all very well to maintain a policy of "No Child Left Behind" IF none of the kids WANT to be left behind. But all too often we're faced with the deadbeats who couldn't give a damn about being educated. They're only at school because they're forced to be there - they're certainly not willing to make the effort to succeed and while the teacher is concerned about not leaving them behind, the smart, willing and enthusiastic kids are being forced to slow down.
Michael in Gr 7 is a math whizz who sleeps in math class because he is bored and still gets straight A's. Is there a fast-track class for kids like him? Yes! But this is the class he sleeps in! Can he do a placement test to enable him to attend Gr 8, 9 or 10 math classes? Not any more - if he finishes the CMS school math curriculum too soon, there won't be a curriculum for him to follow when he gets to high school and he won't be able to do the minimum 4 years high school math while at high school in order to graduate!! And when Sarah picked up all the reading awards at middle school, she was told to reduce her reading so that other kids would have a shot at winning some awards!!
It's time we viewed education as a privilege and not a right. And set a cracking pace which will require from students a solid level of dedication and commitment. It's time to concentrate on giving top-students every bit of support they need to become world-class. And it's time to let the hangers-on and the free-loaders know that their free time at the trough is at an end - either shape-up or ship out.
It's a tragedy for education when one is hard-pressed to think of a single popular icon in society who has achieved greatness through education - these days, the icons my kids know about have achieved success through sport, music, film and by dropping out of mainstream education.
It's time we empowered teachers to do the jobs they are paid to do - to give our children a world-class education and to kick their butts if necessary in order to achieve this objective. And it's time we mandate the schools to clear out the dead-beats - if kids don't perform and if they don't demonstrate dedication and commitment, they're out. I've yet to see a single student being expelled for carrying a gun to school, for raping another student or for assaulting a teacher. And yet at the same time, teachers are expected to teach these kids and are being evaluated against the NCLB criteria - with teaching bonuses being linked to NCLB, it's small wonder that teachers have to cheat test scores to keep the academic detritus moving through the system.
Education in this country is in a poor state with too many students leaving school neither qualified for a career nor for life. Too many of our students are functionally illiterate, cannot write and have a general knowledge verging on the ridiculous. It's all very well to maintain a policy of "No Child Left Behind" IF none of the kids WANT to be left behind. But all too often we're faced with the deadbeats who couldn't give a damn about being educated. They're only at school because they're forced to be there - they're certainly not willing to make the effort to succeed and while the teacher is concerned about not leaving them behind, the smart, willing and enthusiastic kids are being forced to slow down.
Michael in Gr 7 is a math whizz who sleeps in math class because he is bored and still gets straight A's. Is there a fast-track class for kids like him? Yes! But this is the class he sleeps in! Can he do a placement test to enable him to attend Gr 8, 9 or 10 math classes? Not any more - if he finishes the CMS school math curriculum too soon, there won't be a curriculum for him to follow when he gets to high school and he won't be able to do the minimum 4 years high school math while at high school in order to graduate!! And when Sarah picked up all the reading awards at middle school, she was told to reduce her reading so that other kids would have a shot at winning some awards!!
It's time we viewed education as a privilege and not a right. And set a cracking pace which will require from students a solid level of dedication and commitment. It's time to concentrate on giving top-students every bit of support they need to become world-class. And it's time to let the hangers-on and the free-loaders know that their free time at the trough is at an end - either shape-up or ship out.
It's a tragedy for education when one is hard-pressed to think of a single popular icon in society who has achieved greatness through education - these days, the icons my kids know about have achieved success through sport, music, film and by dropping out of mainstream education.
It's time we empowered teachers to do the jobs they are paid to do - to give our children a world-class education and to kick their butts if necessary in order to achieve this objective. And it's time we mandate the schools to clear out the dead-beats - if kids don't perform and if they don't demonstrate dedication and commitment, they're out. I've yet to see a single student being expelled for carrying a gun to school, for raping another student or for assaulting a teacher. And yet at the same time, teachers are expected to teach these kids and are being evaluated against the NCLB criteria - with teaching bonuses being linked to NCLB, it's small wonder that teachers have to cheat test scores to keep the academic detritus moving through the system.
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
The War on Terror
How do you fight a war on terror? You can't. It's an ideology ... it has no country, no uniform, no face and you can't bomb it. I support the American troops in Iraq because they're giving their lives to do a shitty job. But they're only instruments of policy and I don't agree with the policy. To keep America free? Please! Free from what? Terrorist attacks? Iraq never attacked the US. OBL attacked the US because he hates us. Because the US has a military presence in Saudi Arabia (as well as over 700 other military bases on sovereign soil). And when we couldn't retaliate against OBL, we vented our 9/11 anger on someone else to make us feel good and to make Americans feel proud. We entered Iraq with GWB saying this was only to get rid of Saddam Hussein and that America was not at war with Iraq. True in part - we are not at war with Iraq - Iraq is just the battlefield, half a world away from home-plate, where we've been enticed, by a warped ideology, to expend our resources and to lose sight of other priorities. We use nice-sounding sound-bites like "completing the mission" ... what mission? If our mission is to destroy Al Qaeda, will this happen as long as the Wahabib Schools continue to flourish and preach violence, hatred and suicide as noble and honorable causes in the name of Allah? Is our mission to secure the borders of Iraq and to stop the insurgents? Iran has been aiming to claim a chunk of Iraq for years and if Iran didn't succeed against Saddam Hussein, America is a pussy in the long run. We can't even secure our own borders and if we can't secure Iraq's borders, how will the locals ever succeed? I somehow suspect that America is going to have to abandon Iraq sooner or later and unless we figure on staying there permanently, we should get out now and admit that getting rid of Saddam was probably our biggest foreign policy blunder. Sure, there'll be a civil war and the neighboring countries will grab at the scraps, but we spilled the milk and we cannot spend forever trying to clean up the mess. It's time to stop concentrating on a skirmish and time to focus on world events.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)